Star's Bday

One would most likely be stunned, amazed, flabbergasted, astounded, dare I say, even gobsmacked to learn that my soul sister number 9 and I, her conjoined twin, do not actually share the same birthday. It's one of those great mysteries of science that neither man nor God can explain. Well, last year on this very day, I was curious as to what kind and beautiful words that Ms. Cypher would bestow unto me on the anniversary of my birth.
"Mornin' there sunshine supernova. Guess whose special day it is????"
Glancing up at me from her desk chair, as I stood and leaned over the partition, Cypher peered up over her eyeglass frames with a look of dead calm and said, "Eat cho' cake, Anna Mae."
Who needs a lame ass, fuckin' Hallmark when you got a sister who tells it like it is, straight up, no chaser; am I right or what? Uh-huh. You know that I is.

Needy Bastards

In regards to callers who want one ID & one password for every site and how irrationally irate they become when they need to create a new one:
"WHAT!?? I have to put in a new password?? Alls I wants is to get rebooted!!"
Cypher says, "It's like they want a Apple chip in they ass. They gone lo-jack you. Please..." If only it were that simple.

Our Respective Takes on The Lord

Cypher and I were taking advantage of some down time and I was telling her about Al Green's wife tossin' a skillet full of hot grits in his face and thus leading him down a path towards becoming a minister. My take? It's simple, kids: grits'll get ya ta God. Cypher, of course, agreed completely with my assessment and added, "That's right, Jesus wants soldiers - not punks and wimps."
(clearly we do not condone the wasting of grits, or the use of them in any form of violence. and, in all honesty, i'm certain that Christ loves punks and wimps as much as he loves his soldiers. however, we have yet to hear back from him on this.)

Why Do They Do The Things They Do?

"Women. They just keep yammering. No wonder men leave 'em." I hear ya, soul sista; loud 'n funkin' clear, baby.

Turn Ons...

"Star, y'know what I like aside from feet? And I like feet to look at, but I don't have one-a those weird fetish things. I just like feet. Well, I like lisps. Y'know who's got a lisp? McNally from the old Detention Technologies board. Just once I wanna hear him say Lipshutz. Just once." Another dream never to be realized...